It's been a long time. I shouldn'ta left you without a dope beat to step to.

Fact: I am too young to have two children. It's not my fault though, I think kids were BOGO that month. That's one of my "lines". Pretty much any time someone makes a crack about twins (which happens almost every time I go anywhere with them and it's mostly from women over 70), I choose a comeback from my collection that usually gets a laugh and gives me a open to just keep walking. For example:

Old Lady: "Wow, twins! You certainly have your hands full."
Me: (choose from any of the following)
- "Yeah they were buy one get one, I guess."
- "I know, it's like insta-fam...just add milk."
- "Well, thought I'd go big or go home, ya know?"
- "What can I say, I mean business."

Those are a few of my faves. Then there are the age old "twice as nice" or "double trouble" comments. "Womb mates" is also a great description and a little less boring.
But let me be the first to inform the world: boy/girl twins CANNOT be identical. I am actually astounded at how often I get asked this question. I'm not trying to make you feel dumb if you didn't know that. Actually Joe didn't even know that. But "identical" means that they are literally made out of the same DNA because they started as one egg, one person, and then split into two. That's not the case with fraternal twins. One of them is made of XX chromosomes (girl) and one is made of XY chromosomes (boy). So I suppose they could look alike just like any brother and sister can but they're not identical because one of them has a penis.

I'm not sure how I got into all that. The point is I am too young for this. Last week, Brett and Ella each took their first steps within 24 hours of each other. This threw me into a tailspin of emotions. First of all, I mean what are the odds of that happening? And honestly I just can't believe my babies are so big already. Sometimes I can't even believe they're finally out of my belly. I feel like my pregnancy was about 5 years long and since then it's all flown by in about 5 seconds. And I feel like I'm just too young to be saying things like "how did my babies get to be so big??" I might as well head out and buy a pair of mom jeans and throw on some black Reebocks and call it a day.

But whatever, I would take my kids over my youth and my waist any day. Can I get a witness?

And look at these little feet, can you imagine them walking?? This is one of my favorite family pictures we have, even though our faces aren't in it. Shout out to Ms. Sara Becker for the photo.