To each his own.

Let's face it. I'm never bringing sexy back.

I said that to my sweet friend Shana the other day, to which she sweetly responded "Sam, really? That was gone a long time ago." Ok, maybe she didn't exactly use those words but that's what I heard. And she was so right.

I really never thought I would feel this old at the tiny age of 27. But seriously, I've been married for 4 1/2 years, I have two kids, a mortgage, stretch marks, and a MINIVAN! Heaven help me. And that's why I felt like I needed to admit out loud that I wouldn't be bringing sexy back any time soon...well, ever really. I suppose it was good while it lasted anyway. At least it hooked me the man I love....well, that and my hilarious wit, for sure, so it served its purpose :)

So I've been a little hesitant to enter the official soccer mom stage but with our serious possibility of having 3 children under the age of 2, it was quite inevitable. Don't get me wrong, it's a lovely vehicle, it just comes with such a stigma. It's like the punctuation at the end of the sentence of my youth. A big, black, Toyota PERIOD. New paragraph. Can you blame me? It's just a hard realization to come to, that's all.

But what I do love about it is that it means I have the life I've always wanted.

When I was going out of work for my maternity leave, I felt mostly excited and determined like I had a more important job to do at the time (which was to sit still, eat a lot, and be a full-time incubator) but I also felt a little embarrassed when people would ask me if I was coming back. I think a lot of times people tend to give a lot of respect to women who have great careers, whether they do well financially or they're just really passionate about the work that they do. And especially if those working women are also mothers, we tend to think of them like they can do anything, superwomen, spinning plates in one hand while working a business deal in an Anne Klein suit and cutting up chicken nuggets with the other. I am SO not that woman. I am not any kind of a multi-tasker. I feel overwhelmed when I'm reading a book and the phone rings. (So why do we have 15 month old twins and a baby on the way?? you might ask. GREAT question! I'm leaving that one up to God...it was His idea anyway.)

But as I'm nearing 30, I think it comes with a greater sense of self awareness. Just as some women my age are reveling in their success in a paid job (or working very hard toward it), I feel like I'm reveling in my success in my own life. Not that my husband and children were a conquest, and not that I'm a perfect parent and my kids reflect my perfection...by any means! All I'm saying is that I knew from a very young age that this is the life I wanted, and now I have it. I always knew I wanted to be a teacher also, and I feel so blessed that I got to do that and I do very much hope to be able to do it again.

So to each, his own. Right? I personally don't believe that me going to work is best for myself or my family. Being a mom is my vocation and I'm deeply passionate about it. I find a snuggle and a kiss from my babies SO much more rewarding than a paycheck. But if your goal is to work and to never have a husband or children and you find your job rewarding and you are deeply passionate about what you do, then I respect that very much. Or if you can have kids and give them your all and have a job and do that well, then rock on. And shoot, if you can look sexy doing it, then I will holler atcha. I think it's ok for people to have vastly different lives and opinions and still respect one another. Maybe that makes me naive but I'd rather err on that side than on the side of hypocrisy or judgement any day.

So, thank you Joe for stealing my days of singling and mingling.

Thank you Brett and Ella for stealing my waistline and the elasticity of my skin.

Thank you big, black swagger wagon for stealing my dream of driving a Smart Car and looking like one of Charlie's Angels.

And thank you Lord for stealing away my thoughts that my way is the best way and showing me that it's just the way you've given me, and that it's right for me.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I have arrived.